Scanned it in because I didn't have internet to post it

Flip-Flop Pledge (made me laugh)

The Flip Flop Pledge!                            
                                                    
Just a friendly reminder, it's that time of the year again. Please raise your big toes and repeat after me:

As a member of the Faux Paux Sisterhood, I pledge to follow The Rules when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:  

- I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

-I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not  cheat and just touch up my big toe.

-I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

-I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

-I won't wear pantyhose (with sandals) even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it  there.

-If a strap breaks, I won't  duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back in to place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it. No matter how much it hurts.

-I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

-I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

-I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

-I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes look like they've been dragged behind her car on the way to work and no sandal in the world is going to make her feet look good.

-I will promise if I wear flip flops, that I will ensure they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

-I will promise to go to my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $15 and worth EVERY penny). I say spend another $15.00 and get a even better one. And finally...

-I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.

For all our sakes, please don't keep this to yourself, pass it on to other Sisters.

A child's cry

Yesterday, Saturday September 30, Claire and I were working hard to get the house cleaned and get some time together before she went to bed. She watched me make Spaghetti and helped with doing it, too. After eating we were getting the dishes taken care of and she was taking the dishes from me and putting them in the dishwasher. Suddenly, literally out of nowhere, I hear a big THUD sound from right behind me and before I even had the chance to turn around to her, a scream came from her in such a way that I'd never heard before. No one understands how horrible that sounds when you have no idea what has just happened right behind you. As I turned around I saw she was laying on her side right beside the dishwasher. She's in such pain that she can barely move. I put her in the C-Spine position to make sure she hadn't strained her neck, back, or any other area that could help induce shock. As she laid there, literally a pool of blood was pouring out. I knew it was her head, but I was unsure of where on her head it happened because I didn't see it actually happen. My thought process thought immediately to call 911. I couldn't take the risk that she actually have blood pouring out a I was driving her to the hospital. When I called 911 I told them everything that had happened and they dispatched a squad out to help get this under control. Not only did I want to be sure that she was going to be okay by the professionals, but I wanted to verify that I'd be in the right state to drive her to the hospital, and at that point it was very questionable. I was so concerned for her well being that my own thought process was full with thoughts that wasn't very logical. An ambulance and a firetruck had arrived at my house and when they came in I did whatever I could to apply some kind of cloth to help with the bleeding process. As I had taken that off of Claire's wounded area, my hand was filled with the warm feeling, which just so happened to be blood going through this rather thick towel. I had never thought I'd have to deal with such an incident and the entire time I just couldn't get that scream for help out of my head. I felt so useless, so uncertain, and really worried for everything that was able to happen. Claire did not want to go to the hospital in an ambulance and even though Claire had a pretty good about of blood loss, that EMS people explained how long we have to get to a hospital and it she felt well enough to walk, then we should just take her in instead of being mediced in by Ambulance. The EMS team helped with wrapping her head in a way that the pressure would have hopefully made for a well enough hold to get her to the hospital.
Once the squads had left we darted out of the door w/in moments. Got her to the hospital and got her checked in and we were seen within just a few minutes. The doctor was wonderful. He was very up front about everything and told us our options. He explained why stitches would be a bad idea because the location of where the hit was may end up having an infection. So the alternate route was getting staples. Staples are safer than stitches for many reasons. They are much less likely for an infection, they're easier to remove, no shaving of a spot for them, and they are faster to be put in than stitches. After being given those options, Claire choose staples. Once the lidocaine began to numb that spot and the blood kind of stopped, the staples were pit in. The staples honestly sounded like a staple being snapped into paper. The staples actually made her bleed more. The blood was trickling down her ear and down to her chin. The doctor was even more concerned and began to wrap it again to help with applying pressure.
 After waiting about 5 minutes after the procedure, I felt like I was going to pass out. I had to leave the room and take a breather so I could be strong again. The doctors were very accommodating to my needs and noticed how white i was as I approached them. I sat down, they gave me some Sierra Mist (probably the most expensive soda I'll ever have) and some crackers.
Once I regained my composure  I walked back into the room. and it was just about discharge time for us. Claire is off of school until Wednesday, and I will not allow her to have any gym activities this week due to the staples in her head. I don't want anything reckless to happen. Claire was discharged with a note form school 2 days because it's so close to where her eyes glasses are. I do not want to have her go to school with these staples and the. possibly be in pain and she in't able to come home and none of us be home to get her. Thankfully D and I have arranged schedules so that she can be cared for when she is off from school this week.
All I really have to say is, hearing a child scream for help and in pain, Truly my heart aches thinking about it. Hearing her scream in pain made me want to cry on so many levels. It made me realize that she's a strong "lil" girl. she is. She's so much stringer than I am. I would have been  weisale.
Well I'm off oto bed. Thanks for reading.

Transition...

The music industry has surely seen quite a bit of changes over the years. I notice this not because I consider myself to be older, but because the language over the years has changed entirely in songs which've been put out over the years. So many cuss words are said and not even bleeped out anymore in songs. Meanwhile it's not expected that our children cuss in their daily life. We pressure our own and others children to not cuss and explain how often people could alter those words but in our mind even when substitute words are used, our minds are set to process the more vulgar words.
All day I've listened to the early 90's and listening to actual words which were put in the dictionary not because of trends being used in these songs and the beautiful sounds in which they give off is so much different than what today's music is. There were (still are) so many great songs without negative vibes from the early 90's and to have transitioned into the 2000's, it's like we have changed so drastically that I can't even feel good about so much music that's been put out in the recent day and age.
It makes you wonder if people who are growing up in this day and age are going to be capable of keeping real love alive instead of thinking they're in love but in reality it's music that's brainwashed their thought process. Sex, drugs, inappropriate gestures, and so many inappropriate words are spoken in our school system now a days. We pray our children won't get hung up in the thrills that we once did, but our thrills as a child wasn't nearly as extreme as what it is now. We thought extreme while growing up was eating all of our Halloween candy while our parents weren't looking, and feeding the dogs the dinner we didn't want under the table. There was the occasional misfit who chose to try a cigarette and do whatever possible to cover up that smell before our parents got home, but that was the largest extreme growing up, for me at least.
Now their is so much more a child gets into... It's scary that as you raise your child you pray that your own child doesn't have sex at 11 or 12 or even younger anymore, experimenting with drugs, and getting the wrong idea when they go to school, about how important it is to be there.
As the years get closer for many differences to impact Claire's life immediately I can't help but wonder how it's going to be. I worry so much that her release (the same as mine, music) doesn't help take the purity away from her. Even if it's a smooth talking boy who has not really learned how to treat a woman by his parents, or grandparents, but by his lack of being raised properly. So much crazy stuff has happened to the kids, more now than ever before. The loss of their parents, or members of their family being pedophiles, you just can't trust people anymore.
I still remember when Claire was in Kindergarten and one of the classmates told Claire she had gotten into trouble by her brother and then her parents punishing her. The brother was some sicko who had sick intentions and when the girl went to tell her parents they didn't do anything about it nor did they believe her. I can't wrap my head around how some parents raise their children and say nothing about it. Child services got involved because she did turn it in, but it doesn't for one second make the situation for that little girl any better. This kind of thing should never ever happen.
So much has changed since I was growing up... Yeah I know it's been several years, but things shouldn't have changed the way they have. It makes me wonder where this started, and why!? I think to myself a lot of what a child's release is, is where these problems come from. So much has changed and to have a starting point for this, makes it a very long process, but I'm sure it'd be worth the investigation. But for now I'm going to continue to raise my child in a way that many children need to be raised. I'll do whatever I need to so that she's not doing stupid things which are extremely detrimental later for her.
All I can do is pray that it works out as she gets older.

New "Gig"

As I began my new management role last week, I saw just how work can consume one within it. Last week after getting shorted hours due to changing stores, I still ended it with over 43 hours. Do I fear getting burnt out? Not really, because a lot of what took extra time is something that will change here soon when I'm not dealing with others who aren't nearly as organized as I am. But then again, who's to say what'll come from me not having another individual holding me back. This could be awesome, or a giant disaster. lol... I think I'll do well, I have faith in that w/out question. I just have to get my rhythm and once that's established it'll flow perfectly. :)
I really have enjoyed it thus far. I see what I need to work on within the store, and what needs to be worked on in general around the store. I understand a lot more since I've begun, just last week (in this store) and I can feel more confident in my job performance which is a difference from what it was last week. I learned a lot and I look forward to learning a lot more along the way.
I went into Panera, (my old store) on Friday to get my fix on Friday for my iced sugar free skim vanilla latte. It was incredibly delicious. I called before going in to have them hold a few muffins for me and it was nice to hear my old supervisors voice. Once I got there though, it was completely different to me. Everyone looked so unhappy and for me looking at it from the outside, people looked miserable. It was such a tense environment for me since I had been working elsewhere and felt entirely different about how work should feel. It was good to see some of my old people, without question, especially since many of them I still feel good about keeping in touch with outside of work. I, on the other hand, feel like I wish I could help them get away from that misery. This was the first time I'd seen my old GM since leaving and he asked "How's the new gig going?" This coming from him I knew deep down he didn't want me to be entirely happy with my job because before I left I had informed someone that it was my last day and he said as I left the conversation to go help guests, "So she thinks that'll be her last day." as if it was some kind of cult and I wasn't allowed to leave.
I feel so lucky to have had the chance to walk away from restaurant business (for the several times I have) again. This time I feel like I've accomplished something far more than I have in my prior times leaving the restaurant business. I'm more educated, and for this job to give me the opportunity to move from such a business, I feel it'll mold me for a career which definitely requires a lot of what I have lacked within the field of study. This is a job that allows me to build my career from the outside while still giving me the opportunity to build my strength within the field while volunteering at the Humane Society.
Everything else is going well too. Just been getting Claire ready for the start of 4th grade on Wednesday. We have orientation tomorrow and that's when we'll find out who her teacher will be. She's really excited about starting this year but I've definitely been getting her prepared. She has a planner this year that I have informed her to use daily like she did some of the year last year. Trying to inform her of just how important it is for her this year and how she needs to be on her A game. This year is preparing her for the next year. Next year is huge. I said that because the school supplies list is really large in comparison to what it was this year. It's nearly triple the size of what this year was. I'm in hopes that with her starting at this school this year, unlike last year, she won't feel so lost when she goes in this year. With the huge transition from a shitty school to a more intelligent school last year, I think she felt uneasy and quite in question of her capabilities. By the end of the year though, (thanks to a lot of tutoring) she improved her scores and was at grade level once she left 3rd grade. At the start of 3rd grade she was quite below her grade level and her reading understanding was very low. I was able to see that improvement over the year and especially over the summer. Her retaining has definitely become stronger and her vocabulary has grown much more over the summer. Here's hoping that what I've seen is shown in the classroom.
D is on vacation for the next few days and has completed yet another round of classes, successfully. This will allow me and Claire to get our rhythm down while he holds down the fort. Plus it'll allow him to rest more and get his gears ready for a week and a half from now when he begins his next semester.
We did have a day at Kings Island which was a nice time away from home and giving us some family time at the same time.

Claire in front of Breast Cancer Awareness Snoopy. She is now 55" tall... Just an inch above what she needed to be in order to get on ALL of the roller coasters. 

The duckies were all purchases for donations to Komen. I bought 5 and landed one in a ring which gave us unlimited drinks for the day.

The beautiful clouds on the way home. Claire was asking a lot of information about clouds and so I figured I'd take photos of them as a memory of that conversation.

This is one awesome shirt! I will be buying one of those sometime soon. This was at the "80's Store" inside of the park.

Well, I just thought I'd give an update here. Thanks for reading!! :)

Many days have passed....

So, I realize that it's been so so long since I've last updated. So many wonderful things have gone on since I last wrote... So, guess what that means?! Bullet form time... :)

• I started a new job. I am no longer in the restaurant business, which is something I've struggled to get out of since I was 16. So many years within the restaurant industry truly makes you numb if you don't have the heart in it. While I miss many of the people I used to work with, the restaurant industry just wasn't for me. It was something that allowed me to move into some type of job once I finished my schooling and was full of confusion. It did see me through many rough spots within my life and for that I'm very thankful. 
• My new job is at National Check Cashers and I was hired in nearly 4 weeks ago but began 3 weeks ago with my training. I have been really enjoying my job. It's much different than what I'm used to but I am adjusting pretty well, I do believe. My DM is in the store I'm training in at least 3-4 times a week, even if she's just stopping by for a moment. She's very involved, and I very much so respect that. 

1. This is the second DM (in a row mind you) that comes in and is actually involved when there are things to do. I'm thankful for having that opportunity to have worked with and for people who aren't just the sit back and watch everyone else work type of managers.

• Within the next week I will no longer be a trainee, but instead I'll be titled Store Manager. This was brought to my attention today while talking with my DM about my new store and what to expect when I'm there, etc. etc. She responded with "It's your store, Val. You are the store manager, you were hired in for that, but we didn't want to expect too much of you, however you have shown us within the time you've been here that you are worthy of that position and we want you to be in that position." 
• Going from the restaurant industry to this type of work is such a stress relief. There are moments where I'm busy at work, but none of those times have been stressful for me in any kind of way that would even come close to resembling what type of stress I endured from the restaurant industry. 
• I get vacation pay, holiday pay, sick time,and after 90 days, I'm eligible for 401k, health insurance, and a free membership to any gym if I choose to get health insurance, life insurance (which they match at an incredible amount), personal time, long/short term disability, and so many other perks which make things a lot better for me 
• It's a guaranteed 40 hours a week and the wage began at $1 more per hour than what I was making at Panera. I also have a set schedule, which is awesome. I'm guaranteed to have Sunday's off, which is also awesome because that's FOOTBALL BABY! lol

Now, onto home life:

• Things are pretty good here on the home front. D's working his ass off with school to such an extreme that he's barely sleeping and the workload is outrageous but somehow he's keeping up to a point, just in a way that I would have not chosen to do, myself. Whatever works I guess... 
• We have an appointment set up for Claire to go to a therapist on the 28 of this month. Things need to get answered and we really want her to be better and the only way to do that is for us to attempt anything possible to find out where we can improve. She has gotten better, but I think the trust issue is my biggest thing. I have a very hard time trusting her because of things that have made me distrust her before. I have a hard time forgiving and forgetting, so perhaps it's something that can also be brought up at the therapy session. We shall see how all of that goes and I'll be sure to update everyone on that once the time comes and some answers start to come our way.
• Claire goes back to school on the 22nd! Crazy how fast this summer has gone, but she's eager to go back and be able to see her old classmates and meet some new ones, too.
• Sam is nearly 50 pounds and is only 7 months old. Seems we're gonna have our hands full here soon with how big she becomes. MeiMei is doing well. She and Sam are best of friends when Sam isn't the one who is aggravating her. Our cats are doing well. Fatty is getting up there in age and seems to be arthritic but she's still playing as a kitten whenever she gets her wind. 
• Unfortunately Claire's gerbil, Tan, passed away recently. She was heartbroken and it took some time to let the hurt heal for her. We're not those parents who say "Oh, your gerbil ran away." much like a lot of parents did when we were kids. 
• We're trying really hard to socialize Sam, but she is snippy toward other animals outside of this house. But, consistency is really the only way to make her less aggressive toward other animals. She's more so very fearful of any animal which is bigger than her. 

What's been happening in our area.... 

• There is a creeper in the Hilltop (the neighborhood in which I live) who has been hitting the south side streets of the hilltop and not the north side, so for that I'm thankful. If he were to come here it'd be a rude awakening for him with our two dogs. But here is an article about the Hilltop Creeper.
• There was an attempted murder which happened with a nail file. Weird and scary all in one on this, I'd say! Nail file Stabbing
• Then there is this! 

Is that the mid 70's, on my weekend off??? I hear the front yard calling my name!!! :) 

What's been happening...

So yeah, I know I've been out of touch lately. So many thoughts run rapidly through this head of mine. Wondering if I'm going on a path that's best for me, or if I'm just missing out on what my dreams are. I have come to this conclusion though.... I'm fed up with the restaurant business. Honestly, I can't live that life anymore. Ever since I was sixteen, I have lived in the restaurant business or something hospitality based, and truthfully it's taken every bit of me to not walk away and just break. Unfortunately, that's where finances and responsibility comes into play. I have been dealing with such ignorance lately at work, and while people typically don't bother me, I must say I'm tired of hearing "I need....." instead of a friendly "Hello." much like I greet everyone with. I'm fed up with the tiresome hours that make me want to just scream when I'm in bed at 8p every night because of having to be up at 4a to be at work at 6a. While the hours are consistent, it's restaurant business which doesn't guarantee that you won't be sent home 4 hours before your scheduled time because of the lack of business. In addition to that, I have worked at Panera for 8 months and here I am still at my starting wage, which just so happens to be 40 cents more an hour than MINIMUM WAGE, which honestly, I'm much better at my job than that, and I will not settle for less than what I should be receiving. I honestly kick ass at my job. I'm effective, efficient and very reliable. In the 8 months that I've been there, I've been "promoted", trained various amounts of people who are kick ass because of HOW I trained them, and have been cross-trained on EVERYTHING within that store aside from management shit that I will NOT part-take in!
I need to move into something that even IF it's not my field, it'll give me better experience than the restaurants that I've dealt with for the past 16 years. So, I have been busy filling out applications, sending resumes, and getting my name out there so that I can have some kind of name outside of the restaurant business. I have been upset by calls that weren't returned, depressed thinking I wouldn't get into my field fearing I'm stuck in a place that I'm going to be unhappy with for the rest of my life. Which is definitely something I don't have the option for, considering my student loans begin to be paid of in November... Yeah, and this shitty wage sure as hell wouldn't be covering my truck payment and student loans.
So speaking of loans..... I've landed a job with a place called Alway$ Payday, ran by which has offered me $1 an hour more an hour than what I'm currently making. I do not need to hide my tattoo, and I don't have to wear khakis and a polo. I get to wear business casual and can have my tattoo exposed while working without the fear of losing my job because the owner of Panera, Covelli, who believes that tattoos should be forbidden. Well, guess what, my tattoo makes me who I am and explains the love I have for my daughter. If I knew all of the shit that Covelli had done, such as, discrimination lawsuit(s),along with all of the money that was SUPPOSED to support Autism for the Autism cookie but come to find out only 10% of the sale went to the Autism Awareness... Basically what this all comes down to is, Covelli is a lying, stealing, and manipulative man who has never met me but if he has the opportunity within the 3 weeks to meet me, I'd hope to tell him how I feel about him and his industries. He's so full of shit and treats people as though they're meat that are honored to have had his staff hire us. Well, nope, not so much.
I will have my orientation sometime next week. The manager of the store I'll be working at is on vacation until Monday and then from that point I will find out which store will be my home store, I'll have my orientation scheduled, and set up my two weeks of training. Yep, excessive training which will allow me to know all of the laws and regulations in Ohio for the position as a Teller that I'll be working as. This is a full-time position that'll allow me to actually may my school loans monthly amount that'll be due as of November. Time to start saving so that I can be less overwhelmed once I have that bill sitting in my e-mail or snail-mailbox.
Regardless, I'm happy for getting myself out of a restaurant atmosphere. I will miss some people that I work with at Panera, but honestly I can't focus on that, I need to work toward my needs as an individual and it's time to take a stand. I've got a GREAT manager at Panera, and honestly, telling him I'm leaving will be the hardest part because he's been amazing for me. He was an assistant manager when I started there and was the manager that I interviewed with when I was looking for a job initially. He's a good man, a great family man, and very accommodating to me as an mother, wife, and employee.
As for the Humane Society, I must say, I love being there. I love the people there, I love the atmosphere, I love everything there! I'm so happy when I'm there. I feel appreciated, wanted and capable of doing anything. I'm getting my name out there and honestly I hope that one day I'll be able to land a job that's not volunteer there. If I keep myself on the right track, I think I'll be able to make that happen! :) I'm optimistic. I want nothing less than the opportunity to help the less fortunate, and I'm doing that as a volunteer by working with these precious, needy, loving, and compassionate animals who just need a few moments of someones time so that they know they're not forgotten.
Well, that's about all I have to write currently. I need some rest for work in the wee hours of the morning.
:-)