There comes a point in ones life where you can't help but wonder wtf is going on in our school system. I have a child who has been outcasted and picked on for being structured inand out of the home. Claire has had so many problems in every school she has gone to. These past few days have made for some awful comments from fellow students.
Let me just put this out there right now-- I do not always believe my daughter is in the right. In fact, I make sure she's aware of those less fortunate so she doesn't believeeverything is handed out without reasoning or cost. I always inform her that other people have it worse than us. I believe D and I have made sure that she understand others come from broken homes, some parents cannot provide food to their children and sometimes kids only get the meals that their school provides in the AM and for lunch. I always tell her how lucky she is to have both parents are together, all that is hers, is hers to keep, and not to fight over with siblings, and she has her own pets who love her. Many children cannot say the same. I also let her know when she is wrong, she is given punishments for poor choices, and she is listened to but also if word usage is wrong, she is corrected. While that last one may not seem too much of an ordeal, in order for her to speak and write proper, she needs to be corrected.
Now onto the problems she is having. Clairr came home on Thursday and informed us that she was sent to peak. D and I asked why and her response was:
"I argued with a teacher, spoke out of turn, and yelled out at another student." I told her that those actions were unacceptable and I asked why. She continued and said :
"A classmate called me a bastard. I yelled out of turn because I yelled out what did you just call me?"
I gasped in disbelief and was thankful that Claire told me about this happening but was shocked that Claire said that word and it was because she was unaware of the meaning behind that word. I disregarded the action of being sent to peak and just moved forward.
Friday I was at work and received a phone call on my cell phone, which I only check maybe twice during my shift and it is in my cubby. I called D and asked him why Claire's school had called and I was informed that the school was concerned for her well being. D went down to her school and talked with her teacher and guidance counselor. Claire was being picked on at recess, getting punched in her ribs by one girl and Claire made sure she blocked as many punches as she could. Then the child did manage to hit her ribs, called her a bitch and an mf'er then followed that by "I wish you were dead!" Another girl came around the area of the altercation and said the same thing. Finally a child decided to help Claire by flagging down a on duty teacher who was supposed to be monitoring the outdoor activity. Claire then stated that she had thought of hurting herself because of how uncaring they are to her. She feels like she is outnumbered and uncared for.
When this was expressed, the staff was shedding concern for Claire but quickly retreated to stating Claire should be in counseling to have the feeling of hurting herself and that Claire will be talking with her guidance counselor during her lunch period once to twice a week. While I am glad she can have someone to talk to while in school, this would likely be obsolete if the staff would have held their end of the bargin up when they moved her into fifth grade. What was supposed to happen was she would have lunch with the counselor while being able to have an open conversation about how things are going for her and the problems she had and they'd be addressed. So here we are again... Bullying is a type of action that harms children.
Claire is a damn good kid, and honestly I'm about fed up with all of the bullshit that Claire is dealt so regularly. I can't get over how awful school has become. It is awful of this was handled. The children who did the bullying and threats were defended. The staff told Claire she was lucky because the children who are expressing harm are the ones who have no one caring about them. While I agree with Claire being lucky, I am being fed the bullshit of the children's actions are blamed for a childs actions. When children are at thks age group, they are capable of making their own decisions. While I agree that some of the choices are unrealistic, this age knows right from wrong.
What is aggravating for me is this:
Claire is in fear at school because of these girls who seem to get worse by the day.
Kids seem to be so hurtful to one another and its quite bothersome. The severity continues to worsen.
The way to resolve the problems with the children who've messed with her, per the school is to avoid them. Because that is so simple for a child who sits near the problem and threats are becoming severe. .....not!
